Late at Night

Late at night I get these wondering thoughts about you Baby Goose. I wonder what I could have done to make things different, I wonder what our family of 4 would have been like, I wonder how many things I would run over with a double wide stroller, I wonder if Emma-Bemma would have had a little brother or sister, and I wonder most about why God did not want us meet 7 or 8 months from now.

I remember telling my self that if God blessed me with you I wouldn't yell at the lady who told me positive or negative like I did with your big sister, I remember sitting in the AGIP gas station parking lot waiting until 12ish to find out if those home tests were right, I remember going straight to Daddy's work and having him called in from the flightline just to tell him he's going to be a Daddy again, I remember coming home and making a list (that still sits there) of everything we would need for you, I remember calling my friend Becca and telling her in such shock and excitement, I remember telling Daddy we are going to loose our office just so you could have your own room, and I remember most of all sitting there the night before October 13th, 2009 making a list of names for you.

Baby Goose I hope you see the candle I burn every night for you. You are part of my heart forever.