The next day, I showed up at 10 a.m. with an 11 a.m. surgery the nurse lead me to the same bed and they asked the same questions and after a few hours of waiting the same nurses wheeled me off at just about the same time as last. How eerie is it to have someone say "You, were the ectopic... I remember because of the urgency and because of how rare yet easy it was" How do you digest all of that? Not easily and up until they wheeled me off I was still asking if this what was really going on and if this was the right thing. I will say that this time I felt more of a peace considering what was happening. Maybe it's because of the lack of real urgency as last years or maybe it's because I knew my child was not growing and this would never be at least for now or maybe it's because this road is a too familiar road or maybe it's because every player was almost the exact same and after some delay we wheeled off at just about the same time as last year.
Here's to both of my babies up in heaven, Good night and God Blessed you both enough to be in his presence. Mommy Loves you.