Friendships with Women
I have actually sat on this post and what I originally wrote in hopes of truly finding a finer way to communicate how I feel about the friendships we as women carry on with each other. Please do not interpret this as a bashing session, simply look at it as "food for thought" as 90% of what will be written is based on my experience in friendships with other women. In different moments of my life I have found my self truly asking if other women actually have friendships with each other that they whole heartily trust in. Since I left Phoenix in 2008 I have realized that friendships with women can be ruthless, political and possibly close to dealing with someone just a hair short of the devil. I know some of you have quite possibly hit the floor at the last statement but I have found in the last few years that having a true friendship with other women is quite difficult. With how some women choose to carry themselves it can lead some of us non-dramatic, shit happened so just deal with it type women to want to sprint away from any friendship or social gatherings. Please do not get me wrong not all women choose to act in careless, ruthless, or with less than honest mannerisms but I can say finding one true friendship in the mist of what other women throw out as friendships can be hard.
I specifically remember being in 1st grade and asking my Father why my best friend Katie chose to be mean and lie to me. His simple yet truthful statement of "the amount of true friends that you have will be able to be counted on 1 hand" at that age it completely blew me away. The one interesting thing is I know that I am not alone in this blog post, I hear it all the time from other women and to be frank there are even bible studies out there, about why it's hard being a woman. As humorous as it might be...man is not the answer on why it's hard being a woman it is actually other women and how they choose to act and react to each other. Amazingly enough this weekend our Pastor preached about people over preference for unity among God's people.
In Philippians 2:2-5 it states:
2 complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. 3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus.
This not only is God's want in relationships with men & women but also women & women friendships, and man & man. I urge you as a women to stop and think about how you are acting and reacting to each other. Because in those moments of strong emotion, jealously, rejection, discontentment, hurt or sorrow we sometimes make irrational decisions like choosing to betray, lie to, verbally attack or spread rumors about that long time friend that you personally invested into. God brings us together for a reason, it's either a lesson or a blessing. I can say after ending countless friendships over some of the above I know that this is a growing & learning season for me. Each of us have personal struggles and I know that we all do not make 100% of the best decisions in life or relationships but when you feel that you could be in the wrong take some time to attempt to repair the friendship because relationships should not be thrown away like a piece of used garbage. God wants to use each of us in each of our lives to teach one another...it is always a good idea to have someone who is polar opposite or different than ourselves to learn from and to teach.