Monday Morning Mind Dump

 

I am stealing this idea from Josh because, well, it's a good idea especially this Monday since I have a lot on my head. 

  • Most have heard this from me since being here, but it's melt-able hot here.
  • I am not sure how I could ever get used to this or how I am not going to melt this summer. 
  • The list has closed out for a specific job that the AF needs that could take us back to California. 
  • Now it's just a waiting period to see if we'll be moving before August. *tick tock* 
  • I often feel like a gypsy - never settled too long for any length of time.
  • The idea of staying in one place more than 3 years actually scares me. 

  • That thought is probably not normal and has been running through my head a lot lately. 

  • The power of social media. Like, follow, unlike, unfollow repeat? In some cases maybe or some cases never. This thought has two levels 1) Social Media is powerful, not in a self absorbed way, but more so as it can bring the gospel and also community. 2) It can be disastrous when it comes to self esteem.

  • I recently had a close friend unfollow me and it was over the lack of communication - it hurt that she just unfollowed me, but me not talking to her or being too busy also hurt her. 

  • So it made me realize this move has been felt by all of us, including my friends.

  • I am thankful that after I emailed her dialog started and we were able to work it out. 

  • Working from Home - Who thought of this idea? Recently there have been days I don't get out of yoga pants.

  • Wearing Yoga pants all day is not normal, I am used to being up and ready by 6am. The pace is sweet, but the lack of feeling important because I don't put real pants on is starting to sink in. ha! 

  • Being new - I feel like this is just me, I am always new to a team and I am always new to starting something up, like a department that's never been there before or maybe might have not been closely monitored. When I come in and I am doing what I think is right for said item I feel awkward.

  • Why do I feel awkward? Well, I am very aware now of what people think or what their body language convey's (thanks to working in a business where gossip and emotions tended to arise as a problem a lot) so I am very cautious. 

  • I guess it comes down to the feeling of wanting everyone to at least like me a little bit. 

  • Let's be real, rejection sucks and is hurtful. 

  • Bullying is real. I've tended to it more in my adult life than my kid life, so this week when Ms. Emma came home experiencing it more than once, I was heartbroken, but also on the verge of Dance Mom anger.

  • Someone once told me that children are a direct reflection of their parents and after this experience with contacting the Mother I might be swaying towards agreeing with that idea. 

  • This month has been the month of things breaking, between my 2 month old dryer to my hair dryer to my AC. 

  • Let's just say I am thankful that as I type this all things are working. 

  • We went on what seems to be a weekly decompress tea date. It was amazing, I'd like to keep that going. 

  • I also went out of my way to schedule some time with someone new I met in a creative collaboration.

  • I have to say, it was totally worth the risk and worth making the time because I felt like I knew her forever.

  • I currently have two friends here that feel like this is the real deal.

  • It's awesome to see God placing such sweet people in my life.  

  • I started volunteering at the Church as their Social Media Manager, it has been fun.

  • Our demographic is 20-45 year old males so things are masculine - it's quite fun actually because I've either been on a pastel kick or red, white and blue kick (due to my last job).

  • I like that there is no face to the posts and joke about keeping it top secret. 

  • I also like Buffer more so than Hootsuite which is crazy because I've been a Hootsuite fan forever. 

  • I've started MVM Monday (Memory Verse Monday) and WW (Worship Wednesday).

  • So far my favorite is Worship Wednesday, I've been jammin' out all week to the Spotify list. 

  • Volunteering makes me realize I might want to pursue something in Church Leadership, I am 100% sure it won't be Women's Ministry, ha! 

  • That alone tells me God is still working on me when it comes to women and how I can view them. 

  • I also helped a girlfriend set up a yard sale for her adoption, I have to say I am encouraged by their faithfulness to adopting out of the DRC, especially since there is currently a freeze on getting the adopted children out of there. 

  • We've been trying for our 3rd live birth (It will be my 6th pregnancy), and I am not holding faith to his plan as well as I thought I would.

  • It's been really hard because I've never had a problem getting pregnant before, so the fact I've not gotten pregnant the last 3 months make my head hurt.

  • But it's okay because we are still waiting to get all of my medical records so that I can see an OB at the U of A. 

  • I've been reading Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist.

  • I feel like she's been me in some aspects and I also now want to start a "HomeChurch" as she called it, basically meeting with couples every week for dinner, rotating homes.

  • Thanks to a sweet friend sending me an image of Savor (also by Niequist), I now want to read her devotional also. 

  • When speaking about HomeChurchin' it, I realized that Goose is also guarded about people.

  • It made me a bit sad we've both walked this path with people.

  • On the other hand, I realized that when we do make good friends, we keep them forever. 

  • My email is now under control, Thanks Diana for passing that information along. 

  • It's time to get back to "work" and all I want to say is "let's roll"

Jusika Martinez

Tucson, Arizona, USA