Monday Musings // 12.07.15



  • Yesterday was my 1 month anniversary of no longer being a Creative Director at a local church. 
  • Yesterday was also what felt to be my strongest day with the idea of no longer being in that role. 
  • I built that ministry with a lot of prayer + thought. 
  • Mainly because I never saw God using me in that aspect, I wanted to do it right. 
  • Leaving that ministry was the hardest thing I've had to do in a long time, but it was a good move for myself. 
  • Others have said, I used my best "no". 
  • Leaving a ministry in itself, is hard, but add leaving the church in one fail swoop made it harder. 
  • Typically, when we find a church, we are in it for the long haul. But sometimes I see how that doesn't happen. 
  • I am thankful for the people who've connected with me since leaving that role and church. 
  • I am also thankful for the other church creatives and communicators I've connected with via Twitter this last month. 
  • I felt very alone/misunderstood in leading the Creative aspect and connecting with others has helped a lot. 
  • I've continued to educate myself in the church realm of how to because I did notice that working for the Government verses the Church is V A S T L Y different. 
  • We've been attending a new church. 
  • We were both talking about the timing in their series that they were in and are in now. 
  • Reminds me a lot of how things were when we moved to Westside Christian Fellowship. 
  • Gods timing in that situation was perfect and although I've harbored some hurt from this church move he's still speaking to me in mighty ways. 


  • As I sit here looking at Adeline in her 4/5 week ultrasound I am blown away with God's hand in this. 
  • We have 24ish days until the scheduled C-Section. 
  • The idea of a scheduled C-Section or a C-Section in general is weird. 
  • It takes me back to when I first was pregnant with Emma and asked for one because I was afraid of laboring and where she would come from. 
  • I am not 100% sure I am ready, emotionally. 
  • I am not 100% sure you're ever ready. 
  • This pregnancy has made me more reliant on God in the not so "winter" seasons. 
  • I've had to deal and sort through the emotional baggage I had from after the delivering of Ellie. 
  • That was hard, not once did I ever expect to be wrapped into a situation I had no control over after El's birth. 
  • We don't have any of the things like a crib or stroller for Adeline. 
  • That is okay, she's coming a month early, I don't anticipate leaving the house within that month. 
  • Mainly because of my C-section and her immune system. 
  • I have come to terms that this is my last pregnancy. 
  • I cannot believe I've had 6 of them and will have 3 kids with me here on earth.  
  • I often wonder what our lives would be like if we had all 6 of them. #maybecrazytown? 


  • The traveling Airman is in transition for his job. 
  • He will be an instructor now, which means we should have him home more after his training. 
  • It also means that we will be in 1 location for 4 years. (1 year where he's at now and 3 teaching)
  • That blows my mind, we haven't been anywhere 4 years. 
  • We eventually want to buy a house. 
  • But we also eventually want to move to Germany or back overseas after this tour so we might not buy that house. 
  • This Thanksgiving, I met my brother after 25+ years of knowing about him. 
  • Mind blown on that. 
  • I have so many questions, but know they will never be answered because our family is so broken. 


  • Lately my plate has been full with prayers. 
  • A lot unanswered and that is okay. 
  • A lot has been about my family of origin. 
  • I think being back in Arizona places that topic on my mind a lot. 
  • I have also been blown away with God's faithfulness to me. 
  • Even when I am asking him what the heck. 
  • My worship time has gone back to an hour a day, which has revitalized me.
  • My prayer lately has been "Lord, what do you want me to do or learn here?"
  • I used to pray for him to use me and use what he's shown me. 
  • Even now I still see how he's using me, especially when I least expect it. 
  • I've thought a lot lately about my testimony. 
  • It makes me thankful for his timing in my life. 


  • This year has made my shop go 180 degree turn. 
  • It makes me more excited for 2016 to see how it will go. 
  • Right now it's currently closed because of A's birth coming up. 
  • But man have I gotten to work with some great people this year. 

That's what's been on my mind this Monday Musing. Maybe, in 2016 I will share my writings that I've done throughout 2015 and maybe I will feel more at home to write here. Oh, before I go, have you thought about your 1 word for 365? Mine was intentional, I'll recap it before 2015 is over and pick a word for 2016!