The night after my first loss (October 14, 2009) I sat on my couch in what felt like the darkest time in my life. I had just lost Max through an Ectopic Pregnancy along with my tube and had no idea on how to cope. I was searching frantically online for something that made sense to me... something that didn't make me feel so alone. I mean losing a pregnancy in general is something most women go through alone or secretly, but add living in Italy...thousands of miles away from family or friends it made it even more isolating. As I searched that night I found October 15th.com, which hosts the Wave of Light on October 15 at 7pm in your own time zone and for some odd reason I was all in. I went out and bought two candles, one for my house and one for an Italian Fixture that was viewable from our house and at 7pm we went out and lit that candle in public and left it burning there for one hour. It made me feel not so alone and it helped me display that our baby was here and this crappy situation can have beauty. Since then we've participated every year and our friends and family have been so sweet in supporting us by lighting their candles and sending flowers.
As minute as lighting a candle at 7pm on one selected night sounds, it has given us one day during the year to come together with other parents who've lost and remember our sweet babies who left tiny footprints on our heart and most of all, it gave me hope that I wasn't alone in a far away country as a grieved my first and second loss. If you know someone who has lost or would like to join us, click the Wave of Light Image to join the Facebook Event.
Will you join us by lighting a candle this year on October 15th at 7pm?
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